Spike Bytes - Season 4
|Buffy Season 4|
| Sounds Home | Extras | Episode Guide |
BUFFY: | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | Other |
ANGEL: | 1 | 5 |
Click the Episode Name to download the .zip files all listed quotes will be included.
Ep 59 In the Harsh Light of Day (16 files)
"It's definitely the crypt, right? I'm not keen on tunneling into someone's septic tank."
"You'd better be more than sure. 'Cause I'd hate to have to hurt you."
"Nobody knows I'm here. And I'm not killing the Slayer's best friend because that would tend to announce my presence."
"SOD OFF! Now go eat something, I've got work to do."
"I like him ... he's got, um ... what's the word? Vulnerability."
"Is Antonio Banderas a vampire?" ... "No." ... "Can I make him a vampire?" ... "No. On second thought, yes. Go do that. Take your time. Do Melanie and the kids as well."
"I love syphilis more than you."
"We're close now. No one leaves the lair till we're in. I don't want the Slayer tracking anyone to the tunnel. And that means you, Harm. You're an indoor kitty now."
"This gem is everything. I came back to Sunnydale for it; a place which has witnessed some truly spectacular kickings of my ass."
"Love hurts, baby."
"I think I'll go play outside." [after getting the Gem of Amarra]
"I'n't a fantasic day? Birds singing, squirrels making lots of rotten little squirrels. Sun beaming down in a nice, non-fatal way. It's very exciting, I can't wait to see if I freckle."
"Oh, do it again. It tickles. You know, in a good way."
"Official sponsor, of my killing you."
"So, you let Parker take a poke, eh? Didn't seem like you knew each other that well. What exactly did it take to pry apart the Slayer's dimpled knees?"
"Too strong? Did you bruise the boy?"
Ep 62 Wild At Heart (not in zip file, click below)
"Watch your mouth, little girl. You should know better than to tempt the fates that way. 'Cause the big bad is back, And this time, it's... Urrgh! Aaaahhh!"
Ep 63 The Initiative (18 files)
"Slayer... I'll kill you. Not so tough. I... Kill slayer."
"And, uh, they are? The government? Nazis? A major cosmetics company?"
"The Slayer! I knew it! I knew it!"
"I always worried what would happen when that bitch got some funding. She's wised up a bit. Fine! I'll take her apart. I don't care how brilliant she is."
"Sorry, can't stay. Got to go see a girl."
"New plan! We split up. You go that way."
"Oh, never, my little foam latte. Your blondie bear is here to stay."
"Oh, forever and ever, mon petite creme brulee."
"Uh, yeah, and get used to it. Big daddy's home. We're gonna go wherever you want, do whatever you want, kill whoever you want. Starting with the Slayer. And after that, it's all you and me, my little mentholated pack of smokes."
"The head, love. Watch the head. Whoa, watch it!"
"I'll give you a choice. Now I'm gonna kill youl no choice in that. But ... I can let you stay dead ... or ... bring you back, to be like me."
"I felt all right when I started. Let's try again. Ow! Oh!"
"Don't be ridiculous. I'd bite you in a heartbeat."
"I hate being obvious. All fangy and "Grrrr!" Takes the mystery out."
"You know, this doesn't make you any less terrifying." ... "Don't patronize me."
"I'm only a hundred and twenty-six."
Ep 64 Pangs (23 files)
"But, babe, this is where I belong."
"Can I have someone to eat? "
"What part of 'help me' do you not understand?"
"Come on, I'm parboiling out here."
"Yes, bad, but let's skip that part and get to the part where I couldn't bite you."
"I'm saying that Spike had a little trip to the vet and now he doesn't chase the other puppies anymore. I can't bite anything. I can't even hit people."
"Grrr. Bloody hell, woman. You're cuttin' off my circulation."
"I came to you in friendship. Well, all right, seething hatred, but I've got useful information, and I feel I'm being mistreated.
"Oh, someone put a stake in me."
"I just can't take all this mamby-pamby boo-hooing about the bloody indians."
"You won. All right? You came in and you killed them and you took their land. That's what conquering nations do. It's what Caesar did, and he's not going around saying, 'I came, I conquered, I felt really bad about it.' The history of the world isn't people making friends. You had better weapons, and you massacred them. End of story."
"Listen to you. How you gonna fight anyone with that attitude?"
"You exterminated his race. What could you possibly say that would make him feel better? It's kill or be killed here. Take your bloody pick."
"Oh, leave that one. He looks like he's ready to drop any minute, and I think I can eat someone if he's already dead."
"Hey, when do I get fed?"
"Remember that conquering nation thing? Forget it. Apologize."
"Fine, I'll do it myself. Hey, sorry, sorry about that, chief."
"You made a bear! ... Undo it! Undo it!"
"What happened? Did we win?"
"An entire siege... You'd think one of you would bleed a little."
Ep 65 Something Blue (20 files)
"I'm done. Put the telly on."
"It's about time. Hope you got it warm enough." [when Giles brings a cup of blood]
"You are one step away, missy." ... "Giles, help! He's going to scold me."
"Comfy? I'm chained in a bathtub drinkin' pig's blood from a novelty mug. Doesn't rank huge in the Zagut's Guide."
"Giles, make her stop."
"Come on, now! It's telly time!"
"Passions is on! Timmy's down the bloody well, and if you make me miss it, I'll" ... "You'll do what? Lick me to death?"
"Well ... I won't have you doin' mojo on me if you can't read properly. You could turn me into a stink beetle or what all."
"Open up! I'm gonna kill you!"
"Let me in! Fix me..."
"Swear, what? You're not gonna do anything to me. You don't have the stones."
"I get this spell reversed, they'll be finding your body for weeks."
"Just say yes, and make me the happiest man on Earth."
"Fabulous. Enjoy your honeymoon with the big pile of dust."
"Warm breeze tosses the leaves aside, and again you're registering as Mr. and Mrs. Big-Pile-of-Dust."
"Oh, pouty! Look at that lip... gonna get it ... gonna get it..."
"That's my girl..."
"This is the crack team that foils my every plan? I am deeply shamed."
"Oh, bloody hell!"
"Don't I get a cookie?" ... "No." ... "Well, I gotta have something; I still have Buffy taste in my mouth."
Ep 66 Hush (3 files)
"Well sometimes I like to crumble up the Wheat-A-Bix in the blood give it a little texture."
"I'm not having these two shag while I'm tied to a chair three feet away."
"All right, yeah fine, you're a nummy treat."
Ep 67 Doomed (17 files)
"Sodden sleeping chair is bloody sodden."
"Do I look like a plumber to you?"
"Yeah, delivering melted cheese on bread, doing your part to keep America constipated."
"I shrunk them. Bleeding shirt, trousers. I hate this place."
"Go out, get me some decent stuff, and I want more blood."
"You want me to tear this place apart, you bloody poof?"
"You know I'd drain you drier than the Sahara if I had half a chance. And besides, I'm beyond pathetic. Stuck in this basement washing skivvies for a blighter I wouldn't have bothered to bite a few months ago."
"I mean, am I even remotely scary anymore? Tell me the truth."
"Which means I'm one step closer to melting in a sea of molten hellfire, yeah?"
"I should think you would be glad to greet the end of days. I mean, neither one of you is making much of a go at it. You kids your age are going off to University, you've made it as far as the basement. And Red here you couldn't even keep dog-boy happy. You can take the loser out of high school, but..."
"Am not! I just don't want pity from geeks more useless than I am."
"Buffy fights the forces of evil. You're her groupies. She'd do just as well without you better I'd wager, since she wouldn't have to go about saving your hides all the time."
"No pain! I can hurt a demon!"
"That's right. I'm back. And I'm a BLOODY ANIMAL! Yeah!"
"What? I was helping!"
"Me? No. No, sir. Im just an old pal of Xander's here." (in a bad Texan accent)
"What's this? Sitting around watching the telly while there's evil still a foot. That's not very industrious of you. I say we go out there and kick a little demon ass! What, can't go without your Buffy, is that it? Too chicken? Let's find her! She is the Chosen One after all. .... Come on! Vampires! Grrr! Nasty! Let's annihilate them. For justice and for the safety of puppies and Christmas, right? Let's fight that evil! Let's kill something! ... Oh, come on!"
Ep 68 A New Man (12 files)
"Hang on. Let a fella get organized."
"And you're what? Shocked and disappointed? I'm evil!"
"I don't know. Maybe a crypt. Some place, you know, dark and dank. But not as dark and dank as this."
"Demon girl's got a point. I need fresh blood. If I had a few bob for a room with an honor bar"
"What do I spy with my little eye? A demon. That would be ... oh, right ... the things I can kill."
"No, you're speaking Fyarl. I happen to speak Fyarl. And ... by the way, why the hell are you suddenly a Fyarl demon? You just come over all demony this morning?"
"And I'm supposed to just help you out of the evilness of my heart?"
"I'm doing my best. I don't know if I'm driving this thing or wearing it."
"Funny hearing a Fyarl demon say 'serviceable'. Had a couple of them working for me once. They're more like 'Like to crush. Crush now?' Strong though. You won't meet a jar you can't open for the rest of your life."
"Paralyzing mucous. Shoots out through the nose; sets on fast; hard as rock. Pretty good in a fight."
"Now that sounds like a Fyarl demon. Good for you."
"Oh, sure! Dismantle the getaway car. That'll scare them."
Ep 69 The I In Team (11 files)
"Hey! Wipe your feet when you enter a person's home."
"I admit, it's a bit of a fixer-upper. ... Needs a woman's touch. ... Care to have a crack at it?"
"Ugh! You made me lose count. What are you still doing here?"
"Well piss off, then. This bit of business wraps up any I got with you and your Slayerettes. From here on I want nothing to do with the lot of you."
"And I don't want you crawling back here knocking on my door pleading for help the second Teen Witch's magic goes all wonky or little Xander cuts a new tooth. We're through. You got it?"
"Honeymoon is over."
"All right. What do you want me to say? I need help. And no cheek from you."
"You're the goody-good guys. You're the bloody freaking cavalry."
"You right bastard. ... That's all that's left. I spent the rest on blood and smokes, which I'll never see again."
"Ah, come on! Circle the wagons. Tend to the wounded here. No time for layabouts."
"I'm not going anywhere. Not until those bastards undo whatever they did to me. Put me back the way I was."
Ep 70 Goodbye Iowa (7 files)
"Got to hand it to you goldilocks you do have bleeding tragic taste in men. I've got a cousin married to a regurgitating Frovilops demon that's got better instincts than you."
"You think Riley was out knitting booties for your future offspring while Maggie stringing you up?"
"No, I'm just a friend of Xaannderr's. Pfft. Bugger it. I'm your guy."
"What am I, a bleeding broken record? I'm bad ... it's just ... I can't bite anymore. Thanks to you wankers."
"Leaving you swabs to your dramatics, thanks. I've got my stories on the telly for that."
"Double shot of O Neg, keep. Make it the good stuff, don't want no freaking orangutan."
"Been a real pisser of a day ha'n't it? Those Army blokes are on a tear. They ran me out of my place. And all over town."
Ep 71 This Year's Girl (4 files)
"Me? Hey, I'm not the one out of place here."
"Tell you what I'll do then. Head out, find this girl, tell her exactly where all of you are and then watch as she kills you."
"Can't any one of your damned little Scooby club at least try to remember that I hate you all? Just because I can't do the damage myself doesn't stop me from aiming a loose cannon your way. And here I thought the evening'd be dull."
"Dark hair, this tall, name of Faith, criminally insane. Like this girl already."
Ep 72 Who Are You? (5 files)
"What, are you keeping tabs on me? You're gonna give me a hard time now?"
"Well, you don't have to worry about me drinking. Unless you're here to protect innocent beers."
"Was. And as soon as I get this chip out of my head, I'll be a vampire again. But until then, I'm just as helpless as a kitten up a tree. So why don't you sod off?"
"Oh, fine! Throw it in my face! 'Spike's not a threat anymore. I'll turn my back. He can't hurt me'."
"I get this chip out, you and me are gonna have a confrontation."
Ep 73 Superstar (5 files)
"I live here. I wasn't exactly pining for a noisy visit from 'wonder Jonathan and his fluffy battle kittens'."
"Yeah, back off 'Betty'."
"Oh look Jonathan. Taking the little sidekick out for a walk, are we?"
"Ooh ooh ooh! Semi harsh language from Betty! You're feisty when the big guy standing beside you. .... Someday sweet slayer. ... I would love to take you on. .... See you face the evil alone for once."
"No. But then again I'm probably lying."
Ep 74 Where the Wild Things Are (11 files)
"Hey! Yeah, I did. I scared you. ... Gimme money."
"Yeah, it works. Keeps me in blood and beers. Plus, you know, funny, watching those little humans quail."
"I don't see droopy boy on your arm. Did he have better things to do?"
"You know ... you take the killing for granted. And then it's gone, and you're like ... 'I wish I'd appreciated it more.' ... Stopped and smelled the corpses, you know?"
"It's a terrible thing, love is. I been there myself. ... It ended badly."
"You and I should just go do the vengeance. Both of us! You eviscerate Xander, and I'll stake Dru. Like a project."
"What are you doing? You brought me here?" ... "Anya? What are you doing? You brought him here?" ... "That's what I said! Only I hit the 'here' part."
"Oh, who's the puffed-up manly man? All splotchy and possessive."
"Well, may be some fun to be had in the lion's den after all. You two keep scraping; I'll find the liquor."
"Well, this party's starting to liven up after all."
"I know I'm not the first choice for heroics ... and Buffy's tried to kill me more than once. And, I don't fancy a single one of you at all. But ... Actually, all that sounds pretty convincing."
Ep 75 New Moon Rising (_ files)
"From the sound of those massive mud flaps, I'd peg you as a demon. Which means you're in for a world of ... pain."
"Well, that sounds like a lot of fun."
"Yeah ... the thing about the Slayer is ... she is a whiny little thing, but when it comes to the fighting, she does have a slight tendency to win."
"You were a Boy Scout?" ... "Parts of me."
"The door was unlocked. You might wanna watch that, Rupert. Someone dangerous could get in."
"Now, now. None of that. Or I won't help you get Red's mongrel back. Bad news travels fast with us demons. We all like a good laugh."
"I happen to be seeking monetary gratification, yeah. But I also get a kick out of jackin' up those Army ginks myself."
"Fine, if you're not interested. But I was stuck in that hole, remember? And I've heard things from other guys who've ogtten out. I can get you in. No alarms, no cameras ... no waiting."
"Look, would I wear this if I wasn't on the up-and-up?"
"For a nasty town like Sunnydale, nobody seems to mind their locks."
Ep 76 The Yoko Factor (12 files)
"She's a lot more than that. ... The Slayer's dangerous is all I'm saying."
"You're not getting it, Mr. Bits. You're gonna be interestingly dead. Little Miss Tiny's got a habit of bollixing up the plans of every would-be, unstoppable bad-ass who sets foot in this town."
"Just want you to know, when the big ugly goes down, the Slayer's gonna be right in the thick of it. You ready for that?"
"Yeah. I killed the hell out of them."
"Hey, watch it, mate. I don't fear anything. Just know my enemies."
"Because ... Stinking, rotten luck is why. On top of that, now I got this buggering chip up my head."
"You want her evening the odds in a fight you don't want the Slayerettes mucking about."
"You know, for someone who's got 'Watcher' on his rιsumι, you might want to cast an eye to the front door every now and again."
"What, you think I'd come running over saying, 'I've got a secret, beat me till I talk'?"
"Hmm, year supply of blood, guaranteed protection, merry bushels of cash, and, most important ... a guarantee that I'm not to be in anyway slain."
"Feel it in my bones. It's, uh ... called the Yoko Factor."
"Well ... since we've got all our ducks in a row and not talking to each other ... guess it's time for the grand plan, huh? You know, the one where I get the chipectomy."
Ep 77 Primeval (11 files)
"It warms the cockles of my non-beating heart seeing you lads together."
"I'm much more the 'I did my part, now get this chip out of my head' kind of guy."
"So, it's chips all around, is it? Someone must've bought the party-pack."
"Look at little Nancy Drew."
"Got a chunk of prognosticating demon in there, right?"
"Now ... if you'll just get this chip out of my cranium ... I'll be out of your way. And mind the hairline I don't fancy fussing with over a comb-over once I resume my killing ways."
"It's Must-See-TV. ... Bait's been taken. Trap's all set. The Slayer has landed."
"One chipperectomy, please. .... Hello?? Paging Dr. Owe Me One."
"Nasty sort of fellow. Lucky for you blighters I was here, eh?"
"Well, then everything's all right; and we all get to be not staked through the heart. Good work, team."
"Well, let's go save 'em, by gum."
Ep 78 Restless (3 files)
"Giles here is gonna teach me to be a Watcher. Says I got the stuff."
"I've hired myself out as an attraction."
"Haven't you figured it all out yet, with your enormous squishy frontal lobe?"